Friday, February 17, 2012

Waiting for it

I was really not looking forward to Valentines Day this year.. Tator has trouble with holidays. They interrupt her normal, everyday routine that makes her feel very safe. They bring up feelings and thoughts that she is not comfortable with.

Tator has been doing really well lately. We have only seen one rage since Christmas. It had to do with me doing something nice for her. (I hope to get to blog about it sometime.) I knew last night would be hard for her. Valentines Day party at school, a lot of candy and junk she's not used to eating, people giving her things, all these things combined I knew would make for a rough evening. I was determined not to let her holiday triggers set her back.

She came home showing me her valentines and all the candy she had gotten that day at school. She seemed somewhat edgy and started off by arguing about some homework she had. I told her I knew what the paper said as to what she was supposed to do. I told her I would not argue with her, but I did expected her to find something to throw a fit about tonight since today was just to fun for her to enjoy without ruining her evening with bad choices. I told her if homework was what she wanted to make it about that was fine and that I also expected her to hit and kick me so go ahead and do it. I was ready. She stomped off and told me she didn't feel like it.

When Tator is in this mood after school I know the best thing to do is send her to her room to play for awhile. Lately giving her some alone time helps her to snap out of it and she is able to cooperate the rest of the evening. So I told her I wanted her to go to her room and play. She told me she didn't want to and I told her it didn't matter, she was going to do it anyway and if that was what she wanted to throw the fit over go ahead. Oh, and don't forget to hit and kick me, I was ready.

She turned around and stormed to her room with me following to make sure she made it there. When we got there she got upset with me because she can't find one of her toys and she was sure I took it. I told her I had looked for it the last time she asked me about it and couldn't find it then. She then told me I had ruined her Valentines Day because I had lost her toy on purpose. I told her again that I had no idea where her toy was but she could feel free to hit me or kick me now if she wanted to. She then told me she didn't want to as I walked out of her room.

She played up there until supper and came down in a good mood. She did try to argue with me at shower time that she had showered the night before so tonight she didn't need one. I just ignored her and turned on the water. She took her shower and went to bed without a fight.

I am very happy about the way the evening went. We have suffered no set backs from Valentines Day.


  1. Yeah!!! This sounds exactly like something that would happen at our house with Jackson. So glad you had a rageless holiday!!!